January 28, 2007 @ 1:27 am
Manliness: It’s never OK for men to cry
Here’s a sentence I really hate: Men need to be more expressive. It’s even worse when it comes from a guy, and now it’s been said by the chief editor of Men’s Healt Magazine. That should be enough to make you cry, but don’t. Don’t give in. You don’t have to cry. I mean, I think it is OK for men to cry. But nobody should tell you that you need to cry.
“It’s not a biological question; everybody cries. It’s just; do you admit that you cry. And apparently more men are willing to admit that they do now.” Matt Lauer, Today Show
“Absolutely, I think it’s OK for a guy to cry. The age of the stoic man has ended, and that’s a good thing because guys need to be more expressive. But they have to be selective about when they cry.”
David Zinczenko, editor-in-chief of Men’s Health Magazine
Everybody cries? Says who?! Sure, crying is natural for human beings. It can even be healthy, releasing hormones that relieve stress and makes you relax. But not all guys cry. There are other ways to deal with tension, stress, fear and sorrow.
How about some healthy anger?
Crying is a way to accept that there’s nothing you can do and you just have to get it out of your system. This is healthy if you lose someone you love.
Anger is a way to fight back, not accepting that there’s nothing you can do. This may not be that healthy for the male body, as it doesn’t relieve stress, but fighting back can be crucial for families, communities and societies.
We need guys who can mobilize anger and fight back.
“It’s never OK for men to cry. Do you know who cries? Women! And babies. And little baby girls. Men hold it in, until his eyes swell up to the size of baseballs and his throat feels like it’s about to explode and his gut just aches like there’s a snake wrapped around his heart. That’s why we die earlier. But it’s worth it: At least we don’t look weak while we’re alive.” Stephen Colbert, The Colbert Report.
Or maybe there’s a middle way. How about not telling men what’s OK and what’s not when it comes to crying. Some of us need more stress relief than others. Some of us are more warriors than others. And that, my friends, that’s OK.
Filed under Blog, So Manly Permalink
3 Comments »
RSS feed for comments on this post · TrackBack URI
Posted by Is Killing Vital to Manliness? at Brakar.com
March 25, 2007 @ 10:43 am
[...] I don’t get it. I’ve never been in an armed fight. Does that make me less a man? Don’t think so. Being manly is about being true to your masculine qualities and abilites, instead of suppressing them. One of these virtues is the ability to fight and kill, when that kind of behavior is called for. Being able to roar and hit back in order to protect land and family, is an ability that comes in handy in a lot of situations besides war. Every family and society need strong men, but we don’t need wars to prove that we are strong. [...]
Posted by Three Reasons a Man Should Cry at Brakar.com
April 3, 2007 @ 2:35 pm
[...] Real Men don’t cry. We suck it up or at least try to hide it. Crying in front of other people or in public is for girls. And babies. And little baby girls. But there are times when it is OK for a man to cry, even in public. Three times to be exact, according to Budd’s Alternate Reality. Only he forgot sports events, so that makes four… When did it become socially acceptable for a man to cry. Some men do it often and without embarrassment. If I get choked up, I at least try and hide the fact. There are only 3 reasons a man should cry: 1) His dog dies (or he is watching/reading old yellar/where the red fern grows), 2) He is watching Rudy (or similar movie/situation where the underdog comes out and proves how much of a man he is by seriously stepping up) 3) The birth of a child. [...]
Posted by David
October 22, 2007 @ 9:49 pm
Real men cry…many real ones did after 9-11.