I just love it when someone skips the fancy talk at says it like it is; boys are dumb. Mee-shell says “it’s a simple fact of nature.” We are hardwired to be “completely oblivious to the needs of women. It’s not their fault; it’s just how they are - they have two brains and can only use one at a time.” She’s right. We are.

This applies to all men, teenagers and old guys. We are not wired to read subtle signals like women are. We are wired to be physical and single minded. That makes us very good at the things that we do. Women are wired to be social and multi-tasking. That makes them very good at the things they do. So what is it that makes us dumb? We really suck at BEING WOMEN.

One reason they are dumb is because they don’t call, well no that’s not true. We don’t necessarily care that they don’t call us every day or even every other day; we just hate it when they say they’ll call and then don’t. Or when they make plans with us and then break them without filling us in first…. A man’s only as good as his word. Sure women do this too… everyone’s human after all, we forget to call every once in a while too so boys are granted a few passes every now and again, but don’t abuse the privilege.

See? This is what we’re not good at; rambling. One thought at a time, please! And if you keep contradicting yourself we just can’t have an argument. If you say we’re dumb, stick to it.

And another thing is that men don’t quite understand the fact that every now and again women just need to be mad. Sure we forgive you, but you gotta let us be pissed for a little while. Don’t try to calm us down; we each have our own way to blow off steam…. go away, make yourself busy, or buy flowers or chocolates or something of our favorite things, and then leave it for us to find. This is the one time you can pull the “ring the doorbell and run away” trick without getting in trouble somehow… just make sure you leave a card behind so we know who it is and we know that it’s not some crazy random stalker.

Now you’re making some sense, Mee-shell. This is good advice for guys. Women generally need more time to get over a fight. Still, it doesn’t make us dumb to want to fix things. That’s what men do; we fix things.

Another reason boys are simply dumb, they get distracted very easily - video games (ok, I admit it… I love video games too as long as it’s super nintendo… yeah donkey kong ), football (yeah… I enjoy watching football too for the sport, but for different reasons lol), watching tv, napping, you get the picture. But hey it happens to the best of us and it’s probably why they forgot to call.

No, no, no, NO! Not distracted - FOCUSED! Men focus better than women. It’s like we have a zoom-in-lens and you have the wide-angle. And while you take it all in, we focus on one thing at a time. That’s not dumb at all.

And another reason boys are dumb… they pms too, only they deny it. (At least we don’t deny it when we pms… we usually warn you and tell you to stay away… lol). But male pms is real; tt hasn’t been proven scientifically yet, but that doesn’t matter.. it’s true. They have their own mood swings too. Even if they don’t want to admit it. And they are oober sensitive to random things. And whenever they bust out the “I don’t care- I’m just saying…” crap… you know they care.

Next!

And finally (cuz I think I might be running out of room) boys can’t take a hint.. take for example when we don’t call back or don’t answer the phone - oh it works; we just don’t want to talk to you right now. There’s a reason we didn’t return the 12 missed phone calls from you.

You got us there. This is where we’re really dumb; taking a hint. Because women has to send subtle messages to guys even though it never works. And you know it. You know that real men suck at being women, and that’s why you love us.

Illustration photo: Dumb by Allmightymo